weapons of massdistraction

We’ve have had some pretty great times lately but I’ve been feeling burned out. On life in general and not just the solo parenting. The stress of attempting to sell our house has been wearing me down. A recent prospective buyer, the asshat who forced us out so very early on a Saturday morning, left comments that the place is “a little rough around the edges.” Not sure what they’re expecting for under $70k. And the potential buyer of last week, the one who was waiting for a bid from a landscaper before making an offer - well, we haven’t heard a peep from her all week. Good thing I didn’t really get my hopes up. But my nerves have been shot and I know I haven’t been in patient parent mode. More like broken record nagging-mom mode.

Wash that pizza sauce off your face!
Why do you have peanut butter all over your shorts?
Well of course the cat bit you. Stop grabbing him like that.
I am not a poop head! Could you please send me some *nice* texts?
I told you not to eat upstairs! Do you want ants? Because that’s how you get ants!

And so on. So the boy and I will both benefit greatly from this little break. He made it safely to his grandparents’ place today, after two unaccompanied flights. He will be doted on and taken to the ocean, to the beach and out on a boat, and to swimming pools and mini golfing and to hang out at the dog park with their dog Max. And when the lad returns we will head to the State Fair together to eat Vegie[sic] Fries and suck down Sno-Kones and Sky Ride away all of our cares. And not long after that we will enjoy an awesome party for his 12th (TWELVE?!) birthday where he will be receiving a Big Ass Remote-Controlled Flying Shark and life will be great. On that day in particular not a single fuck will be given.